Of Miracles And Magic

lettiehorse
Over Easter weekend Scarlette rode a pony for the first time. I’ve never seen her so excited and it was one of my favorite moments that I have experienced as her mother so far.

For me the tears seem to come at the oddest moments. They never fall when they are supposed to, when we’re at another specialists office, holding her down for another invasive procedure, stomach twisting in knots as she screams. They surprise me suddenly at moments like this, when I set her gently in a saddle, unsure, and she turns to me, beaming, with a smile that could melt the hardest of hearts and says “YEAH! I WIKE DIS MOMMY! I WIKE DIS HORSHIE! I WIKE DIS!”

I always worry that the doctors all think that I am unfeeling when she falls and needs staples in her head and I don’t cry. I know it’s a trivial worry, I know that it’s borne of a string of months where self-preservation traded tears for talking bili levels and threading tubes and counting breaths. I’m okay with that because I feel confident in a crisis but I still worry that the stoic will be mistaken for uncaring.

And I go to events like this and then I worry that everyone thinks that I’m an emotional basketcase when I suddenly start sobbing over Scarlette smiling at ponies. Because to a stranger, she’s just another kid riding a horse but to me she is miracle and magic.

(And then if you’d seen the incredible tantrum she threw when she had to get OFF said pony and subsequently be carried screaming out of the arena, you’d have been like “Oh honey, you cry all you want to.” Meaning me. Because OH MY GOSH THAT TANTRUM.)

Pretty Wicked Moms (bless their hearts)

 | This is a compensated review post, y’all. It’s also hilarious. |

The first time I experienced mommy judgement was when I was pregnant. I mean, I hadn’t even had my baby yet and so I was totally taken aback by the whole thing. I had taken my niece to a birthday party and was cutting up a hot dog for her. She was very excited about this, exclaiming “Keeka, I can’t wait! I just can’t wait!” because apparently when you are two years old, hot dogs are THE MOST EXCITING THING EVER.

I was mid slice when another mom glanced down at my plate and said “Ohhhhh….”

I looked up at her because due to the tone of her voice I thought that maybe she was pregnant and the sight of a hot dog had totally repulsed her. Or something. And that is when she followed with “You know, cutting hot dogs like that is a choking hazard.”

Which, granted, was a good little tidbit to tuck away for the future but definitely could have had a nicer delivery. I joked that it was a good thing I was getting a practice run on a kid who wasn’t mine. She raised her eyebrows and walked away and I thought “I do not think we will be friends, hot dog lady.”

Lifetime is airing a new series called Pretty Wicked Moms which is basically similar to The Real Housewives except that these women all have young children. I don’t typically watch those shows unless I’m being forced to by my mother because she loves them. But this one is set in Atlanta and I always love to see my hometown on reality television. And Y’ALL. I’m totally going to visit the store in the show and see these women in person.

Normally I’m pretty lax about mommy judgement, now that I am one and due to the aforementioned experience but I have to say…I judged all over the place watching the premiere episode. I mean, I can’t even. Here. See for yourselves:

BLESS THEIR HEARTS.

Also, Lifetime wants me to tell you to: Tune in to watch parenting like you’ve never seen before with the first episode of Pretty Wicked Moms on Tuesday, June 4, at 10:00 pm ET/PT on Lifetime

And I want to tell you that seriously, if you watch this PLEASE come back to this post and talk about it with me because I am DYING TO TALK ABOUT IT and so I’m anxiously awaiting June 4th so that y’all can all chat about it with me.

“FTC DISCLOSURE REQUIREMENT {Kayla Aimee} aims to provide unbiased editorials. However, I wish to disclose that from time to time I may receive free products or other compensation from companies for blogger reviews.”

Easy Peasy DIY: Make A Sandbox From A Storage Bin

diy sandbox, make your own sandbox, sandbox from storage bin
I was chatting with Tiffani about wanting to find a small sandbox for Scarlette because we keep a running tab for one another on what to look for when we’re garage sale-ing. (That’s friendship in your thirties, y’all.) She mentioned that someone in her homeschool group told her about making a sandbox out of one of those plastic bins that go under the bed.

And I was all A) That is genius and B) I bet they totally found that shiz on Pinterest. That sounds just like something Pinterest would do, making a sandbox out of a storage bin.

So then I went searching on Pinterest and fell down a rabbit hole of completely elaborate homemade sandboxes complete with canopies and lawn gnomes and hidden panels that turn into picnic tables and painted to look like a replica of Hogwarts. I’m just kidding about that last one. (Although someone should totally do that because it would be the most epic sandbox ever.)

I finally found what I was looking for, and it really was as simple as I envisioned.

So here is why this is the best sandbox ever: When we are done playing with it, it just rolls under our table!
diy sandbox, make your own sandbox, sandbox from storage bin
I picked up this sterilite one with wheels, which was a great tip from Stuff Parents Need because I put two forty pound bags of sand in that sucker. Turns out, wheels are definitely a necessity when trying to move eighty pounds of play sand if you are commonly mistaken for a twelve year old girl, which I am. I also put our splash mat (we have this one) under it so that I can dump most of the lost sand back in before I close it back up and that seems to work pretty well.

I wanted something small-ish and portable because we spend the majority of our morning doing “stations” on the back porch and I didn’t want to take away from our play space permanently. Also, I was pretty sure Scarlette’s sensory issues would prevent her from actually putting her feet IN said sandbox so I wasn’t worried about it being too small for her to sit in. Turns out, she fits with lots of room to spare seeing as how she is tiny but I was right and she prefers to sit next to it and only play in the sand with her hands.

Ours ended up costing about $10 because of how there were no prices listed for the storage boxes and when we checked out we discovered there was also no bar code on it. The cashier was a very sweet old man who said, “How about I charge you seven dollars?” And I replied “They are definitely more than seven dollars. I think they might be around twelve?” And he said “Well, seven dollars sounds good to me.” And so I was all “OKAY!”

And then he forgot to put all of the food we bought in our cart and we didn’t realize it until we were home and I had to drive all the way back to the store so that we’d have something to eat for dinner. There is probably some sort of lesson in that story.

Anyhow, I didn’t buy her a bunch of sand toys because we had a lot of toys for the water table that I thought would work for both but I did let her pick out a bucket and shovel. She asked for a purple one and then she spent all morning going “YEAH! I BEEYULD DA SHAND CASHLE! OH BOY!” It was basically the cutest thing ever, kind of like my kid.
diy sandbox, make your own sandbox, sandbox from storage bin

 (*some affiliate links used, although they are totally unhelpful since the things I listed are currently out of stock on amazon. I’m amazing at blogging, y’all)
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Get A Free Book At Dollar General Courtesy of MARS®

This post brought to you by Dollar General. All opinions are 100% mine.

If there is anything that I love it is BOOKS and the word FREE. And if there is anything that Lucy Dog loves it is dog food. She also enjoys lying in the sun and barking at shadows, so she's really not THAT hard to please. 

When I got this email about free books for buying MARS® Petcare products at Dollar General I was like "SWEET!" because it listed Pedigree® and that is the sort of food we buy for Lucy Dog. She is getting pretty old (13! In people years!) and so we buy her a special kind for her joints since she's getting a little creaky and sometimes needs some help getting on the couch. Let's not talk about that or I'll get really sad.

SO ANYHOW.

Next I was like "Wait, I did not know that MARS®  owned Pedigree®. I just thought that they made candy so I totally learned something new today!" Then I googled around to make sure the candy factory and the pet food factory were seperate because I am slightly neurotic. (No worries, my Snickers addiction is safe, y'all.)

The point of this is that right now Dollar General is holding a promotion where you will get a coupon for a free book when you buy $10 worth of Pedigree® or Tempatations® petcare products.

And when you redeem your coupon for your free book, MARS® Petcare will donate $1 to the Dollar General Literacy Foundation to support literacy initiatives.  That's just a good deal all around right there. The free book is from Bendon Publishing and as I'm headed to do our weekly shopping tomorrow I will see if it is a bodice ripper ;)

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The Sword In The Stone (aka The Paintbrush In The Porch)

the sword and the stone
Scarlette spends a half an hour every day sitting on our back porch, painting with watercolors. I spend a half an hour every day sitting on our back porch drinking another cup of chai tea and assuring her that yes, that definitely DOES look just like Bob The Tomato. (It looks nothing like Bob The Tomato.) (But it is a circle and that, y’all, is genius.)

At some point when I had my back turned, my tiny little twenty three pound two year old daughter took her plastic paintbrush and jammed it into the slats of the porch. That is where it remains today, because NONE OF US CAN GET IT OUT. Seriously, it’s been there for weeks and every single person who has visited our house in that span of time has been led out the back door, pointed in the direction of the paintbrush, and told to pull.

I like to wait until right before someone has a good grasp on it and then start solemnly quoting The Sword And The Stone to them all except that apparently, no one has ever read that book but me.

(Seriously, it was also a Disney movie. How am I the only one who knows this?!)

Anyhow, the paintbrush is still lodged in my porch. And the obvious thing to assume from all of this is that Princess Kate is most likely currently pregnant with a boy, who will one day come to my house and remove said paintbrush from my porch so that he can resume his rightful place on the throne as the King of England. And that is how I will get to meet Prince William.

Jeff says that probably that is not the case and that it’s not some sort of prophecy at all but something about something about how maybe the porch got wet and made the paintbrush swell. But I think he’s just jealous that his efforts at pulling out the paintbrush proved futile and means that he’s not rightwise King.